Slushy, CPAL- The recent days in this army community have seen a wave of allegations and satire posts by a man named O’Regan619, also known as Regan. Today I am here to settle once and for all the mystery of FURRID-19 and why such allegations were made by this sick twisted man, who I, unfortunately, lead the Ice Warriors with. Please be aware that this post contains heavy use of SATIRE.
First and foremost, note that I will be talking about O’Regan619 here. Now Regan, who is the same person as O’Regan619, (just more “evolved” as he proclaims) will argue that he is not the same person as the topic of this post. This leads us to a similar arguement that has taken place in our army community recently and is something I would like to call the “Da Best Paradox.” Now Da Best Paradox is a very complicated commodity and is not the easiest to understand. We all know Da Best as the Janitor’s and Ice Doritos creator and legend and also the inspiration behind my legendary Da Best army which was unfortunately terminated, however, Da Best was a man who was not very reliable in terms of honesty and level-headedness. This is where the Da Best paradox comes into play.
As you can see above, Da Best claims that he is not the man in the picture Regan showed because, in that picture, he went by a name insignificantly different from his own even though we all know that he was the man in the picture. This will be the same argument Regan will make, claiming that he is not the same person as O’Regan619, the man under trial in this post. Sadly for Regan, any argument he makes about identities now will be disregarded.
Now, to solve the mystery of FURRID-19, I present my theory that O’Regan619, himself, is the true host of FURRID-19 and he just uses people like Mehakk, Otter and myself as a deflector shield.
To begin my presenting of evidence, I decided to interview the man closest to O’Regan619 and his name is Agent 11, a fellow leader of the Ice Warriors.
Interview with Agent 11, confidant to O’Regan619 and leader of Ice Warriors
CPAL: Hello Mr. Agent 11. How are you this fine evening?
Wonderful weather we’re having.
CPAL: Ok so I am here to discuss your co-leader, Regan. Can you, as a long time army veteran confirm that he is the same person as O’Regan619?
I can confirm this.
CPAL: Have you noticed any significantly odd things while leading with this man?
Yes, when he first came back he was a normal drunk lad; however, when I brought him into leadership, he started… making strange noises. He also does weird things with his body and sometimes has random pieces of fur… very odd to me
CPAL: Interesting… Why do you think O’Regan chose to expose Mehakk, Otter, and myself?
You see, Mr. Madhav, it’s a very common trick people like to do. They point the finger to everyone but themselves so they look innocent.
CPAL: Exactly what I was thinking! Do you think he himself is the sole contributor for the spread of FURRID-19 in the CPA community?
You know, with pictures being leaked of O’Regan619 himself being at furrycon, it explains where the random fur spots came from… I hear him bark in his sleep too. I’m starting to see others in IW do such actions too, and I am becoming concerned about my co-leaders and I because we work closely together. May God have mercy on us all.
CPAL: So in conclusion, is O’regan619 a furry?
It is with a heavy heart that I say yes to this question.
Basically, O’Regan619 lost his Club Penguin membership due to expiration and made the wise decision to retire. Personally, I believe that after the occurrence of such an event, O’Regan looked for other options on the internet to quench his thirst of boredom. Due to this, I firmly believe he discovered and resorted to the ways of a furry. His involvement in the Furry community at such an early age definitely shaped the way he is today and I think that said Furry community took a young O’Regan in with open arms after the traumatizing event of him losing his Club Penguin membership.
With that being said, this concludes my evidence proving that O’Regan619 is indeed a furry. He goes around pretending to be some detective who is credible but the truth is, he uses the means of attacking innocent people such as myself, Mehakk and Otter to hide who he truly is because he is afraid. Me, on the other hand, is not someone ashamed of what I do. Yes, I do indeed enjoy dressing up as different animals on CPA: TG but this does NOT make me a furry like Regan. 32op, the man who gets delivered these pictures sometimes indeed does ask for them but I digress.
What do YOU think!? Did O’Regan put down the reputation of others to raise his own? Did the disheartening event of O’Regan losing his Club Penguin membership lead him to become a furry? Let me know…